stagnation

picture007Sigh.

I wish I had something inspirational to say about the last week. Instead, I sit here, bundled up, because I’m too lazy to close a window. Confession: I can’t close the window due to the adorable furball that has me locked into my chair. And also forcing me to type one-handed. Which really sucks.

Yes, I did take the photo above just moments before I started this post. The sluggish, sloth-like image is the perfect representation of how I feel about how my health and fitness journey is progressing. In that it’s not.

After one solid week of getting back on the running program, I ran one singular day last week. My body needed an extra day to recover from Monday’s run. Knowing if I pushed myself I could sustain an injury, so I listened to my body and gave into rest. I did my weight training throughout the week. Only my running program suffered.

I have another confession: I’m not in love with running at the moment. This isn’t a new revelation to me, but I’m only now coming to accept that truth. I suspected it a month ago, but I refused to acknowledge it. With so far to grow, so much to improve, and a 5K looming on the horizon, I forced myself to keep going. No longer.

However, I am enjoying the weight training. I want to really throw myself into that and give the cardio a break (excepting salsa classes). At the moment, I like my Saturday morning runs, so I think I’ll keep that as a run/walk just to get some intentional physical exertion over the weekend. That way, I can maintain my existing endurance on the pavement and get some lovely morning air.

Still having a lot of trouble keeping to my diet plan. Luckily, my weight has been pretty consistent (after my low in mid November, I hopped up a few pounds when I resumed training). My saving grace is that I long ago outgrew overeating. While I’m not always having the best or the right foods, I’m not out of control when I consume them. I have a much healthier attitude toward portions and the sense of being satiated. That is a hard process to overcome, and I empathize with anyone who suffers this challenge.

Having roommates in the house without my dietary restrictions makes resisting temptation very difficult. All the delicious things are at a level the kids can grab, and being kid-sized myself, ugh. Fortunately, I have no taste for crackers or “cheese flavored” things.

Mostly, during the day, I do okay. It’s at dinner time, when I’m tired, stressed out, and so on that it’s easier to make poor decisions. Or after dinner, late at night, when I get a craving for something high fat. So far, roasted salted cashews are helping with the late night craving (cashews have that soft texture with a slight buttery flavor that makes it an ideal snack for me), but I think maybe adding in some Greek yogurt might not be a bad idea either.

I’ve been mildly self-deprecating in this post, but really, I don’t feel bad about what appears, on the surface, as a lack of progress. Quite the opposite! Tremendous amounts of progress has been made. Six months ago, I wasn’t running or lifting weights or watching what I eat or how much I sleep or how I think. All of these things have changed…dramatically.

I can run nearly a solid mile without stopping to catch my breath.

I can swing a 20-pound kettlebell up above my head 100 times.

I can do a real push-up. Or two. Or three. Or five. Aw yeah.

I maintain a consistent sleep schedule, and usually have few problems falling asleep or staying asleep.

I don’t overeat anything. And when I eat the “bad stuff” I can stop after a bite or two.

So while I didn’t progress as quickly as I would have liked (let’s be honest, my expectations tend to outpace reality 99% of the time), it’s progress, and it’s absolutely worth celebrating.

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